I can be a bit rigid at times. By that, I mean that I like my schedule. I like my routine. I think it stems partly from being a Taurus. It seems a lot of us Taurus people generally love and thrive on routine and stability. We are a fixed earth sign. We love consistency, predictability, and reliability in all aspects of our little Taurus lives. That is the one part of “Astrology” that I find fairly credible. And that is the description of our personality types by our signs.
But I got off track.
The other part of my need for routine is my OCD. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. So many use the term lightly, but I have been diagnosed as such. It steers me quite a bit. And I will tell you this. If I could choose differently, I would. But most of the time, it presses down on me steadily.
But I got off track again.
What I’m trying to say is this. Control. It is not just me.
In general, we humans like to be in control. We do things to make sure we have stability in our lives. We plan. We organize, schedule, save, strive, and prepare. We build roofs over our heads. We invent systems. We create routines and rules and calendars.
And for good reason. Most of the time, it makes our lives “safe” and predictable.
Human history is, in many ways, a story of survival through control. Shelter mattered. Food mattered. Community mattered. All the people before us have learned how to shape the world so it wouldn’t destroy them. That part is real. Necessary.
But then there’s the other part if control. We are often reminded just how small we are in the greater scheme of things. And those things remind us that we don’t always have control. The Universe is much larger than we are.
No matter how much thought we give the subject, no matter how prepared we are, there are things that will rule our worlds and refuse to bend. There’s timing. Other people. Illness. Loss. Love. Weather. Chance. Tragedy. The unexpected turn that knocks on the door without an invitation.
So, oddly enough, this is where trust enters the story.
“Trusting the universe” has become a popular phrase, hasn’t it?
But it’s often misunderstood.
Trusting the Universe doesn’t mean sitting back and doing nothing. It doesn’t mean being idle. Trust is not laziness disguised as spirituality.
Trust is what happens after we’ve done our part.
We work to get closer to our goals. We dream and build and show up. We try. Sometimes we fail, but then we turn around and we try again.
And then, at some point, we release our hold on the entire situation, whatever that thing might be.
That release is not a weakness. It’s wisdom.
It’s the recognition that life is sometimes a give-and-take. We are not meant to dominate the Universe, only to participate in it. And sometimes, when we loosen our hold, something unseen steps in. Support appears from an unexpected place. An opportunity comes around that we didn’t even know existed. Or sometimes we get stopped, and it saves us from a path that would have cost us more than we could afford.
Trust doesn’t guarantee outcomes we perceive as being the best. That’s the hard part. Sometimes things turn out beautifully and according to our plans. Sometimes they don’t. Sometimes the thing that arrives looks nothing like what we prayed or hoped or worked for.
But when we trust, over time, it grows into something more. We feel a sense of steadiness. Equanimity. Maybe it even becomes grace. Grace is the thing that takes hold of us and allows us to say that “I did what I could.” And from there, the rest is not ours to carry. We turn it over. And then, if need be, grace is the thing that turns our disappointment into acceptance if things don’t work out.
The thing is. Here in this Universe, in our world, we are not powerless. Nor are we all-powerful. We will succeed. We will fail. And in that comes the balance.
Take responsibility where we can. Release what we cannot control. And live our lives, one breath at a time.
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“You can’t stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.”— Jon Kabat-Zinn
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“Let go of the battle. Breathe quietly and let it be.”— Sylvia Plath
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“Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.”— James Baldwin
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