I’m a little hungry as I write, so here are some random foodie observations from the planet as we know it. Thank goodness we have food. We need it. Now, to see about the edible world.
Yesterday, I heard someone say, so-and-so, “was feeling their oats.” It made me wonder just how that phrase got started. I used to eat a lot of oatmeal but can’t do so any longer. But that’s a story for another day, maybe. Even still, I can’t imagine sifting my hand through a bowl of oats like I was trying to read oat brail.
I found that “feeling our oats” doesn’t refer to people but to horses. When someone feeds a horse some oats, instead of its regular diet of hay and grass, the horse tends to get a burst of energy. It gallops about and will act as if it’s a spring chicken. They thrust out their chests and stand a little taller. They’re feeling those oats. They say this quick energy comes from starches, sugars, and B vitamins in oats. Regardless, when we are feeling our oats, we are romping around with reckless abandon. Mane-ly.
Thinking about oats always reminds me of nuts.
Here’s the thing. You can’t name your kid Nutella if you live in France. Two parents tried to name their daughter Nutella, saying they wanted her to be loved as much as everyone loves that nutty spread. And then a judge told them to keep their sweet buns in the oven. He banned the Nutella name. Just so you know. If you are planning on getting pregnant, abroad. If you are a broad. Soon you would be broad.
Since Nutella has come up, I hear it is great on graham crackers. Well, this might be a good bit of trivia for that pregnant couple in France. Sylvester Graham invented graham crackers to quell sexual urges. Yes, it is true. Sylvester Graham really had a thing against sexual desires. The thing of evil, he said. So, he thought whole wheat could help control it. Hence, the sweet wheaty cracker. I’ll wait to hear the results of the study if there ever is one.
Switching to a healthier realm, we may as well talk about kale. It has become a thing of popularity. Personally, I think some people eat it just to be hep. I’ve had it at least a dozen times, and I’m not crazy about the stuff. I’d rather eat something else. Anything else.
Anyway, before our nation went crazy for it, Pizza Hut used to be the biggest purchaser of kale in the United States. Yes, indeed. They placed kale in their salad bars to make them pretty and green. They’d line it all the way around and just let it lay there. Right where it should.
Finally, speaking of laying around and lying around. For all you oyster lovers out there. Raw oysters are still alive when you eat them. Think about that for a minute. Remember how people would sometimes swallow live goldfish at fairs? Seems like the same thing. Yep, those oysters are alive and screaming all the way down your throat. And if they aren’t alive? Be worried.
Dead oysters have a high number of bacteria, and if you eat them raw when they’re dead, you could get sick. If you ask me, they are wanted, dead or alive.
And that, my friends, is all down the hatch.
=========
“The only time to eat diet food is while you’re waiting for the steak to cook.”
― Julia Child
==========
“You are what what you eat eats.”
― Michael Pollan, In Defense of Food
===========
“Everything you see I owe to spaghetti.”
― Sophia Loren
===========
Feeling your oats and spreading Nutella where it doesn’t belong
