Somehow, I missed it. Yesterday was National Junk Food Day. I was unaware of this until I saw the late news, and they reported on the event. The newsman said donuts were the most popular junk food, followed by pies and ice cream.
I was surprised that donuts would be number one. I don’t think of them as junk food, but more like a breakfast staple. Just like I would never call pancakes, waffles, French toast, or cereal “junk food.” I rope donuts right in there with this food group.
The same goes for pies and ice cream. They seem like desserts to me. We all know desserts, the cakes, cookies, the mousses and the custards.
Junk food — to me — seems like Cheetos or potato chips and dip. Food that you wouldn’t eat at a meal. Unless.
Anyway, that’s what the reporter said, and he seemed very verified as he read the information from the teleprompter.
I thought perhaps, a look back at other junk foods might be helpful for this occasion — the decades that junk foods were born into this world.
1940
There were loads of candies and sodas invented and released in the 1940s. Most notably was Mountain Dew on the drink side of things. I should say that Coke (born by a pharmacist in 1892, Atlanta) and Pepsi (originally created and developed in 1893 by Caleb Bradham and introduced as Brad’s Drink) had long been on the scene.
I would be remiss if I didn’t tell you that M&Ms were invented in 1941. And of course, one of the biggest snacks invented, ever, were those crunchy Cheetos, 1948.
1950
This decade brought treats like Eggo Waffles came on the scene in 1953. But I think these are breakfast food. Same with Trix cereal in 1954. Hot Tamales candies in 1950. But the nearest to my heart is Cheez Whiz in 1953 by Kraft. My affection doesn’t stop with Cheez Whiz, but it carries over to just about any cheese in a jar, especially the Limburger kind, which isn’t true Limburger, but the spreadable variety. It, along with Cheese Whiz, and the other jarred cheeses, should only be eaten on a purely crisp saltine cracker. Any other way is sacrilegious.
1960
The big hit of this decade was Doritos, which were invented in 1966 at a Frito Lay restaurant in Disneyland. Go, Mickey, Go.
Other treats invented in the 1960s include Oatmeal Creme Pies, Starburst, Sprite, and Pop-Tarts. I think Pop-Tarts are ingenious. If I ever eat sweets again, I’ll probably start with a Strawberry Pop-Tart, or a frozen Zero Bar.
1970
The 1970s brought a WHOLE other level to junk food. Things ramped up a notch. Junk Food took on flair. First, Wally Amos launched Famous Amos Chocolate Chip Cookies (1975). Then, the mother of all tubs, Ben Cohen and Jerry Greenfield, opened Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream (1978). And what a treat, Jelly Belly gave an entirely new meaning to jelly beans in 1976.
1980
I had a great deal of fun in the 1980s when the invention of microwave popcorn hit the shelves. And, those who know me, know I’ve had my fair share of Diet Coke, also released in the ’80s. Another favorite, Bagel Bites, was born. And, not my favorite, Sour Patch Kids.
After 1980, there was nothing new under the sun, just spin-offs of all the classics.
1990
Gushers were launched in 1991. Dunkaroos were first released in 1992 by Betty Crocker. And Hershey released its Cookies’ n’ Creme bar in 1993. I don’t even know what Dunkaroos or Gushers are.
2000
Boring. Two major innovations in junk food came in 2004 with the release of the Take 5 candy bar and the launch of Mountain Dew Baja Blast exclusively at Taco Bell. You see what I mean? The junk food world had been completely discovered by the 80s.
I know, I know. We are supposed to be concerned with healthy habits and good eating. But if life gives you Easy-Cheese and Lay’s Potato Chips, you better make the Cheese-Chip.
============
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I’m not hungry enough to eat six.
— Yogi Berra
===========
Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon.
— Doug Larson
=========
He was a bold man that first ate an oyster.
— Jonathan Swift
=========
Junk food junkies. Through the years.
