Are good manners slipping? It seems to me that they are.
They’ve been on the decline for quite some time now. There was a time when people addressed one another with sir or madam, and when people called each other by last names only. Mr. Smith. Miss Johnson.
These days, people do not show the same respect for others that they used to. This is very apparent in child-parent relationships, student-teacher interactions, and so on.
But there is a whole other level to bad manners—and that is the uncouth.
If you’ve ever described someone as uncouth, you probably meant they were rude or rough around the edges. Many times, they simply do not behave in a way society approves of.
The actual word uncouth has a story far more interesting than the insult we toss around today.
Uncouth began as the Old English word cūth. Cūth meant “known, familiar, or understood.” So when you add the prefix un-, you get “unknown” or “unfamiliar.” That’s it. There was nothing rude about its original meaning.
But over time, it changed. It went from “unknown,” to “strange,” to “wild,” to “rude.” It morphed into the meaning we use now. I suppose when something—or someone—feels unfamiliar, we often interpret them negatively. We may see them as threatening or improper. Language simply followed our instincts.
Back to manners and such—those who are uncouth fall right into that general category. But bad manners go even deeper. They show a lack of respect for our fellow human beings. And honestly, the world could use more respect.
So… if there is uncouth, is there such a word as couth?
Yes—there is. It’s the original base form meaning cultured, refined, or well-mannered.
It’s not used nearly as often as its unruly counterpart, but it’s absolutely valid. If someone is polished and charming, we can call them couth. We might make their day—or they might give us a funny look.
The important thing?
Let’s all be couth.
Let’s all show good manners.
All I’m asking for is a little R-E-S-P-E-C-T.
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“Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others.” — Emily Post
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“You can easily judge the character of a man by how he treats those who can do nothing for him.” — Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
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“To be kind is more important than to be right.” — F. Scott Fitzgerald
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“Politeness costs so little, yet buys everything.” — Lady Mary Wortley Montagu
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“Respect for ourselves guides our morals; respect for others guides our manners.” — Laurence Sterne
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