I learned this morning that certain penguins engage in prostitution, of sorts. Apparently, they trade sex for pebbles, to build their nests. This sounds suspect to me, on many levels.
First, there are the scientists, who are standing around watching, gathering this data. One of two things could be happening here.
1. The scientists are misreading the scenario.
2. The penguins are completely pulling one over on the scientists.
I think it is the latter. I know penguins, and I can hear it now.
“Becky? Those guys in the white lab coats are back. Are you ready?”
“Not again Earl, I have a headache.”
“Oh, c’mon! I went out and got a whole boatload of pebbles today, just for this very occasion. Let’s really give ‘em a show tonight.”
“Fine. But the next time we decide to create a hoax, I get to pick the activity, Earl. Not you.”
“You drive a hard bargain, Becky.”
Oh, who knows. It may be true. I like penguins. When I was a kid, and I finally got my own room, which was somewhere around the time I was 12 or 13 years old, I decorated the entire thing with penguins. Penguin posters. A penguin light. Well, I guess that was about it. But I liked them, and I still do. Not as much as dogs. Or squirrels. Or even possum for that matter. But. I think they are cool, no pun intended.
Do you happen to know the penguin’s favorite relative? Aunt Arctica.
Okay, I’ll stop. Seriously. They are incredible animals, especially when they walk. That waddle. Thankfully, there are 17 different species of them on our planet. And all 17 live in the southern hemisphere. And penguins are as different as people.
Some are tall. The Emperor Penguin is the tallest, in fact. Some are nearly 4 feet tall. Think of it. I’m 5’6 1/2. ( I love the 1/2 inch part. But I can’t tell you where exactly it is.). Anyway, those big penguins probably come up to my chest. That’s a tall bird.
And then, some are short. Like the Little Blue Penguin which is only 16 inches tall. That’s still a pretty big bird.
They’ve been around on this planet for a long time. There are penguin fossils that date back 60 million years. That means they were around when the dinosaurs went kaput. I guess if an Ice Age were the culprit, penguins would be well suited to survive.
Penguins though. Back to the sex thing. They have this “whole” mating ritual deal. First of all, most penguins (except for a couple of species) mate for life. They choose the same partner every year. But when they mate? They do it in large colonies, with over 1,000 penguins present. All mating with one another. I’m not sure what this says about them, as individuals, or a group. Who am I to judge?
There’s a lot more I could tell you about penguins, but enough is enough. Penguins have crossed my path in some way, three times this week, so I decided to write about them.
I like the way they dress.
The way they walk.
And I only hope, they like us too.
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What do penguins sing at their birthday parties?
Freeze a jolly good fellow.
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How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together.
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A local bartender was working late one Friday night when a patron comes running through the door.
Patron: “HELP! I need to know how tall a penguin is!”
The bartender puts out his hand and says “probably this tall”
The patron looks terribly concerned and he says “Oh no! I think I just ran over a nun!”
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