I’ve read this in the news before, and this morning, it has re-surfaced again. The headline read: “Trump supporters say God chose him to be president”
I’m not going to write about Trump, not in full. Because, while I initially want to poke fun, the truth of the matter is, this is incredibly dangerous. This statement is divisive. In addition, it is blatantly casts an air of superiority, on so many levels. But, saying this to others can bring absolutely no good to anyone, given the divided feelings on the topic.
Yet. People, who have taken the bait on this, have swallowed it whole. The hook rests firmly in the roofs of their mouths and even the suggestion of its removal is incredibly painful to them. I have no advice for the rest of us, standing around on the banks, watching them flop around on shore, as they scream, “This doesn’t hurt one bit. This hook is exactly where it’s supposed to be. They told me so on FISH News.” But there we stand, and we watch, in our own disbelief.
The thing I’m getting around to is that we Americans are full of fancy ideas. Sometimes senseless, sometimes obscure. Other times mainstream and incredulous. Yet we think our little noggins into stupors sometimes.
Everywhere you turn, our land is full of wild ideas and epic superstitions.
Take Wyoming. If you are there, and you give someone a knife, it will supposedly sever the relationship between gift-giver and recipient. And, if you want to ensure this doesn’t happen, the receiver should pay for the knife with at least a penny. I would think people in Wyoming would just start buying one another nice ties, or crazy socks.
On to Tennessee. If you find yourself cursed there, as many people must, all you have to do is put a piece of coal in your right front pocket. When the coal dissolves into crumbs, that nasty curse had been lifted. Say goodbye to the itch. The laundry becomes an entirely different problem.
New Hampshire, the granite state, has its superstitions too. All around this good land, the number 13 has been associated with bad luck century upon century. But in New Hampshire, all because of one state legislator who was superstitious, there have been no seats labeled 13 in the New Hampshire statehouse since 1958. They are rock solid on this.
In Missouri, they believe thieves always look into their cup before they drink, according to some. Uh-Oh. I always look in my cup. I am just checking to see that nothing is floating around in there before I take a drink. I once tried to shoplift at Woolworths when I was eight. So maybe there’s something to this.
I have a few words for the people in Maine. They believe dropping a buttered slice of bread with the butter side down brings bad luck. Plus, it’s no longer sanitary to eat. My thoughts? When you drop your buttered bread, that IS the bad luck. And depending on the floor, and the time of butter/floor contact, I say “go for it.” You’ve turned your luck around.
Up in Maryland, they have a doozy. Here goes. You shouldn’t walk backward downstairs because you may curse your parents. But if you walk downstairs backward, carry a mirror and count each step. By the 13th step — if you haven’t fallen — you will see the reflection of your future husband. Okay, this would be bad for me on so many levels. Especially the husband part.
Finally, I have to end on a good note
In the great state of Delaware, the Nanticoke people, who are native to Delaware, believe the seventh-born child holds magical powers. I think most of you know, but I’ll say it again. I am the seventh born child. Again, there might be something to this one.
As you can see, from sea to shining sea, we are a land full of unique, and often times, outrageous beliefs. So the next time someone explains to you that “God told them so,” you may want to ask for the phone number. The direct line.
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“The good thing about science is that it’s true whether or not you believe in it.”
― Neil deGrasse Tyson
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“If we don’t believe in freedom of expression for people we despise, we don’t believe in it at all.”
― Noam Chomsky
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“Tell people there’s an invisible man in the sky who created the universe, and the vast majority will believe you. Tell them the paint is wet, and they have to touch it to be sure.”
― George Carlin
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