I remember the first time I heard the phrase. I was watching a movie, 9 to 5, the one with Dolly Parton, Lily Tomlin, Jane Fonda. I was delighted with the movie at the time, loving every minute of the thing. But a line, spoken by Lily Tomlin, struck me. So much so, it stayed with me long after. She’s walking out of some office, and she turns and says, “I’m a tree. I can bend.”
“I’m a tree. I can bend.”
I was some carefree sophomore in high school at the time, not giving a single thought to anything in the world around but my airtight Polly bubble filled with sports and secret crushes. But something about that phrase broke through and planted a seed somewhere.
Back story. By nature, by my very Zodiacal sign, I am a Taurus the Bull. Stubborn. Unwavering. Fixed. Immovable. We are homebodies. We stay firm, like cement.
But putting those AstroSigns aside. Even if I were not a Taurus, these characteristics would be true about me. I am dogged and unmalleable.
Anyway, the phrase in the literal sense suggests that trees are flexible. When a strong wind comes along or a change in the weather, the tree is able to bend so that it isn’t snapped in two by whatever storm may be happening around it. Or perhaps just a gentle breeze is blowing, ruffling its leaves. At either end of the scale, the tree gives way, just enough, to maintain its well-being, its life, its place in this world.
From the outside, it may have the appearance of a hundred-foot oak. Strong and solid. But, bet all your money on the fact that it can bend if it needs to.
We could probably take a lesson from the trees in this way. In a lot of ways, actually. But. On bending?
First, what most don’t consider, is the physicality of it. Flexibility refers to our body’s ability to move a joint — the joints in our bodies. If we are flexible, we can fully and painlessly move through a natural range of motion.
So being flexible, in more practical terms, means that we can do the things that come to us in our everyday lives. Those simple things came easier when we were younger, like getting out of bed or bending down to tie a shoe. Or reaching up above for a high shelf. All those movements require our joints to move through their range of motion.
I should add this too about me. Physically, I’ve never been a flexible person. While all the other kids in gym class could reach down and touch their toes or put their heads to their knees, I felt like I would snap if I moved a quarter of an inch further. My body is as rigid as my psyche. From a very early age. Oh, to be Gumby.
Anyway, as we all well know, as flexibility wanes, daily activities become more difficult. Flexibility tends to decrease as we age. Being sedentary only speeds things up in this area. It puts us on the decline. It can cause pain.
The same is true for our spirits. Like a tree, like a kid in gym glass, we need to bend. The first step in being flexible may be simply accepting that things will change. The wind will blow. Or. We’ll be asked to touch our toes. While it’s impossible to expect the unexpected, we can still anticipate that new things will happen. Sometimes, just readying ourselves may be enough to help us bend.
They say our well-being comes from staying in the moment and focusing on what is happening in the “now” and nowhere else. Maybe that is the key to finding flexibility. In remembering that change has come before, and change will come again.
Now, if only I could stay calm about bending.
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“That which yields is not always weak.”
― Jacqueline Carey, Kushiel’s Dart
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“Plan B’ might have been ‘Plan A’ all along.”
― Craig D. Lounsbrough
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“The measure of intelligence is the ability to change.”
― Albert Einstein
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Bending. Like Gumby. Or a tree.
