Have you ever been talked into doing something you didn’t want to do?
You know those times.
Someone smoothly asks you to be somewhere or to join some kind of group. Maybe they implore you to take on a task or go on a trip. And the minute that three-letter word escapes your mouth. That y-e-s. You know you’ve made a mistake. Those times.
And when that happens, it just might be that you have been cajoled.
cajole
verb | kuh-JOHL
Cajole usually means “to persuade someone to do something or to give you something by making promises or saying nice things.” It can also mean “to deceive with soothing words or false promises.”
Sometimes, in life, we have to do things we don’t really want to. It just rolls that way. And, depending on the circumstances, we grow from those experiences. Somehow. If we are paying attention.
But still. There are those moments leading up to the thing when we know we have been cajoled. Persuaded. Wheedled. Maybe even hoodwinked. Like when Tom Sawyer convinces Ben that whitewashing a fence is great fun. And then, after some bargaining, Ben agrees to give Tom his apple in exchange for the privilege of working on the fence. That kind of cajoling.
However, the circumstance of cajoling may be something entirely different. I am an introvert with anxiety issues. The mere thought of being in social situations, even low-scale events, makes me uneasy, Nervous. And, depending on the circumstances, I sometimes get “worried sick.”
But along comes Martha, a friend, inviting me to go out to a show with the whole bunch of other Marthas. She’s happy about it, says it will be a great time, meet you at six, wooo hoooo. But all the Marthas are pretty extroverted, and it WILL be fun for them. This is classified as “unintentional cajoling.”
And then there is this.
Cajole reminds me of Cajun. And I’m not a fan of Cajun food, especially blackened food. I’m sure the “c-a-j” is the culprit. Anyway, blackened food reminds me of something Martha left in the skillet, frying away when the phone rang. Delores was on the line, and once the two of them get to chatting, the rest of the world fades away from the focus of their conversation. Thirty minutes later, Martha returns to the stove, only to see the very burnt piece of trout sizzling in the black crust that used to be butter. It’s burnt. Blech burnt. But her husband is waiting for dinner, so she calls it Cajun Blackened Trout and serves it up to Melvin. He eats it, not wanting to be accused of failing to try new cuisines. And there you have it. Martha cajoled Melvin into eating the cajun fish.
Most of the time, you, and many others like you, read this blog to be entertained, or informed, or even, perhaps, inspired. Somedays, you read it just to be nice.
And other days, like today, you’ve been cajoled into reading on, hoping for some great message here.
I suppose the only fitting thing to say is,
“Don’t take any wooden nickels.”
Or maybe,
“Don’t trade the cow for the magic beans.”
Or perhaps,
“Don’t buy any bridges from the guy in the overcoat.”
Because often, cajole is in close proximity to the gullible.
But we’ll tackle that word another day.
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All generalizations are false, including this one.
— Mark Twain
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The trick in life is learning how to deal with it.
— Helen Mirren
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You can fool all the people some of the time and some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time.
— Abraham Lincoln
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You’ve been talked into that thing. You have.
