I saw a social media post the other day that said something along the lines of:
They’re not obstacles, they’re opportunities.
It sounds good, doesn’t it? In theory, at least. I mean, it is empowering and motivational. LIke. You could probably tape this to your bathroom mirror and say it out loud every morning. (I’ve seen social media posts that tell us to tape these messages to our mirrors, and such.)
But. Are obstacles really opportunities? I think, with this and everything else, there are no hard, fast answers. There is no definitive yes or no.
Sometimes, this is true. Some obstacles do force us to grow. They bring out strengths we didn’t know we had. And when it is all said and done, we can look back and say, That big boil on my butt that one time really wasn’t that bad. In fact, it made me a better person.
But sometimes, I look at the world, and it makes me wonder about that motivational phrase. Some time ago, I watched a segment on 60 Minutes that made the phrase tip over and fall.
It was about a town in West Virginia with horrible, dirty water. It was unsafe in every way. I mean, you certainly couldn’t drink it. Unless you wanted to get sick. It looked and smelled horrible. The residents had complained. They had documented. They had even begged for help. From the government or otherwise.
But for all their trouble, and concerns, and letters and phone calls and pleas for help, nothing has happened. There has not been a fix. All those people have are years of being ignored.
I’d certainly call that an obstacle. I don’t see an “opportunity.” Not one little bit.
That’s a failure.
And it made me wonder how easily we just toss around that phrase and others without asking who we’re talking to. We say these things, and we don’t take time to realize what other people might be carrying around in this life.
If we have resources, life is a completely different story.
But someone facing trouble without any resources faces an impossible battle.
For most people, trouble is not merely a motivational exercise. Their troubles are an assault on their lives. Like the whole water thing in West Virginia.
You know, hardship is often begged off as a call for resilience. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger and all that crap. I don’t think everything is meant to make us stronger. We don’t have to be Superman all the time. We’re human after all.
Sure. Broken things need to be fixed. And some things are meant to be stopped. Injustices. Wrongdoings.
Clean water should not require personal growth. It requires the responsible parties to do what they are supposed to do.
But even with all this said, the saying “They’re not obstacles, they’re opportunities” didn’t come from nowhere.
I think the reason it is used so much is because many people have transformed their hardships into purpose. People do take things that hard, and they grow from them. The opportunity wasn’t in the obstacle itself. It was in the response.
I believe that distinction matters.
The fact is, most likely, that some obstacles change us. Others need to be removed.
And maybe the trick is knowing the difference.
Resilience is powerful.
But so is pain and suffering.
May we find our way through them if they come to us.
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“Do not confuse endurance with strength. Some things must be ended, not survived.”
— Audre Lorde
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“Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.”
— James Baldwin
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“There is a difference between what tests us and what destroys us.”
— Rebecca Solnit
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“Some problems are not personal challenges. They are public failures.”
— Ta-Nehisi Coates
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